Why Common Relatable Girl Twitter is the WORST Kind of Twitter

Well we've gotten to this point guys. This post has to be a thing. A thing to change the way things are. Because if it doesn't, us and all our friends that we hold near and dear to our heart are going to go clinically insane.

We aren't sure if you tuned in to the most recent episode of Our Bad Podcast, but in it we briefly touched on certain Twitter accounts that flood our timelines on a regular basis, and how they instill in us a rage that burns with the intensity of a thousand suns, and ruin a day no matter how good it starts.

And unless you live with Patrick Star, you know exactly the accounts we are talking about. They may go by the names (and these are all random guesses but we guarantee they exist):

@PrincessProblems

@CommonWhiteGirl

@CommonPrincessProblemsRelatable

@PrincessSassyCommonProblems

And writing those four alone made us angry, so you get the point. Basically these accounts, for sure consisting of a name similar to the ones on that list, and a Disney princess twitpic to boot, spew out a nauseating stream of tweets that have to do with the same few things.

Liking food. Liking sleep/naps/staying in bed. Wearing sweatpants. Getting annoyed with significant others. Etcetera.

First off. Guys. EVERYONE LIKES TO EAT. It's something we all do. Specifically speaking I could draw a sample of participants from all corners of God's green earth and poll them, and I am positive that pizza, chocolate, and ice cream would all be favorites. EVERYONE, likes pizza Becky not just you. It's not relatable because you are a princess or a common white girl with sass. It's relatable because pizza is the doughiest yummiest goodness known to man and you're a sociopath if you don't like it.

And not just the types of food, but how often. These accounts also consistently talk about loving to binge eat, or going to the gym but then ruining it by stuffing their face with all the above foods and more. You know who else likes to eat, and eats particularly after the gym? Yup, you guessed it again. EVERYONE. And that's not even because food is good. No, it's because scientifically speaking you burn energy during exercise - and then obviously need to replace it. You know. To live. Ipso facto, there is nothing quirky or adorably cute and relatable about this. HOMEOSTASIS IS TO BLAME for you coming home and stuffing your face Brittany, because you are a functioning human being.

Same goes for sleep. Oh you like sleep Taylor? Two guesses at who else out of the 7 billion people in the world like sleep? It rhymes with shmeveryone. NO ONE, is pissed to come home from a long day's work, and crawl into a warm bed and sleep.

*Editor's note: Kids in fact do hate sleep. We do apologize. We also don't know how many kids there are in the world out of the 7 billion, but we assume they are not the majority (though that would be nuts, kids rule!). And once they turn like 12, they like sleep anyway because teachers start to put letters in math and that tires anyone out. So we still aren't that wrong there either.*

Loving sleep and cushion induced bliss is not "So ME, ugh!" it's so everyone who has ever been a human being in the history of mankind. And moreover, everyone probably likes naps even more, and why not they're just surprise midday sleeps, so your posts about naps are also annoying, if not more so.

And do not. DO NOT. Get us started on the whole significant other thing. We have seen posts about relationships, both failures and "goals" on Twitter

more than anyone whose lived 3 full lifetimes chained to a computer chair. Sometimes put seriously, with a post about a sweet boyfriend (reminiscent of the nice guys that the girl who retweeted it obviously turned down in the past, but that's another story). But sometimes they're sarcastic posts about why they are #foreveralone, or undateable, or hate Valentine's Day, or want to just marry their dog (lmao so me who needs boys come here Fluffy!), and those are exponentially worse. Also, vocab snaps for use of 'exponentially' there, complete with correct spelling.

*Second Editor's Note: This wasn't part of the original draft, but we absolutely have to touch on it since it was mentioned in that previous paragraph. Tammy, EVERYONE loves dogs, and EVERYONE likes to pet dogs to some extent. WE KNOW.*

We can't really put our finger on why this annoys us so much, aside from the fact that there are 14 Quintilian different accounts spewing the same nonsense and that almost every girl we know retweets it. But what we

are absolutely positively sure about is that it's time for it to end. We have endured more than enough tweets complete with cute gifs from 'Toddlers In Tiaras', and we just want peace of mind as we scroll through our feeds. Please, @ ALL 'Relatable', 'Common', 'Princess' Twitter accounts, from the bottom of our hearts and for the sake of people everywhere: Stop it.